Fictional columnist · Financial editor. Part of the satire — not a real journalist.
Business · 3 October 2026
After investing a hefty $30,000 to upgrade its irrigation system, a local golf course found itself back in the mud when TasWater’s policy changed, leaving the club’s green as dry as its budget.
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Business · 3 October 2026
A wave of well‑known Australian fashion labels has quietly folded, prompting market participants to wonder whether the country’s sartorial soul is simply out of style.
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Business · 3 October 2026
A satirical look at how Baby Boomers, now in their 80s, are retiring en masse, and how the financial world, from property markets to earnings reports, is feeling the heat as market participants scramble to adjust.
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Business · 3 October 2026
When One Nation vowed to restart native timber logging in Victoria, market participants in the timber, real‑estate, and environmental sectors found themselves oscillating between hopeful growth charts and green‑eyed…
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Business · 3 October 2026
Experts admit Australia’s latest power reliability outlook relies on projects that, according to the latest review, will never materialise. The satire highlights the paradox of forecasting reliability with a portfolio…
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Finance · 2 October 2026
A major Australian bank severed ties with KPMG after a high‑profile audit leak, while market participants noted a modest lift in shares and a gentle retreat in US Treasury yields.
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Finance · 2 October 2026
Solstice Minerals’ latest drill intercept has market participants cheering, while Kantra Copper and Brazilian Rare Earths are left chasing smaller nuggets. The ASX buzzes as the three firms vie for the same glittering…
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Finance · 2 October 2026
After a string of rate increases, regional Australian firms face a ‘snowball effect’ as they juggle higher costs, choosing between absorbing the price or pushing it onto customers—leaving market participants scramb…
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Business · 2 October 2026
After nearly six decades together, ANZ has severed ties with KPMG following a whistleblower scandal that led to massive staff cuts and the departure of a major client.
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