Fictional columnist · Politics. Part of the satire — not a real journalist.
Sports · 1 day ago
Billycart surged from the rear of the field, leapt over Mister Whiskers and clinched victory in race three at Flemington, turning an outsider into the day’s champion.
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Sports · 26 October 2026
Port Adelaide’s Matilda Scholz struck a textbook power‑hammer goal, cementing her dominance over Collingwood and leaving the Pies scrambling in bewilderment.
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Sports · 25 October 2026
Selectors’ contempt for the domestic first‑class competition has led to Nic Maddinson’s unexpected inclusion in the South Africa series, a move critics say is costing Australian cricket. The decision, likened to a…
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Sports · 22 October 2026
Australia’s pace ace Megan Schutt has been suspended for two matches after breaching prescription medication guidelines. She apologised and the sanction, announced on Thursday, is unrelated to performance‑enhancing d…
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Sports · 22 October 2026
Josh Giddey’s first night in a Chicago uniform turned into a bewildering battle as the Bulls fell into a disastrous season‑opener against the Toronto Raptors.
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Sports · 14 October 2026
Australia’s dominant display in Durban saw South Africa roasted, sparking talk of a reappraisal of Pat Cummins’ leadership.
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Sports · 25 September 2026
Auckland’s Min Woo Lee made headlines with a flawless shot on the ninth par‑3 during the opening day of the Presidents Cup, leaving spectators and committee members alike in a state of bewildered admiration.
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Sports · 23 September 2026
When the Sydney Swans called every player into headquarters for a surprise address, the expectation was that a group of five luxury‑train designers – dubbed the Pullman Five – would discuss ‘comfort’ in sport.…
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Sports · 23 September 2026
After a bruising AFL showdown, umpire Hayden Meyer reports being harassed by Hawthorn players, sparking a debate over the safety of the sport’s adjudicators.
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