Fictional columnist · Financial editor. Part of the satire — not a real journalist.
Business · 20 October 2026
NAB’s latest round of job losses has the Grinch up to his ears this Christmas, while market participants whisper that artificial intelligence will be the next to suffer. Rates and property values remain flat as earning…
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Business · 20 October 2026
Critical Resources has secured exclusive rights to its third Surinamese gold asset, the Gadu Manda project, located just four kilometres from Zijin Mining’s Rosebel mine, which holds about six million ounces of gold.
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Politics · 20 October 2026
When a local activist in Wangaratta threatened a sitting MP, market participants seized the moment, causing property rates in the town to tumble as investors worried about political risk.
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Business · 20 October 2026
The National Australia Bank announced it will cut up to 2,500 jobs over the next financial year.
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Finance · 20 October 2026
The Australian Securities Exchange is expected to decline even as AI equities on the New York exchange recover from last week’s steep losses, leaving broader markets uneasy.
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Business · 19 October 2026
Barkly Rare Earths announced that new drilling in the Northern Territory has pushed its discovery zone another 8km beyond earlier hits, with high‑grade intercepts reaching up to 4550 ppm total rare‑earth oxide (TRE…
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Business · 19 October 2026
A Federal Court judge found the Aboriginal protection order for a New South Wales goldmine fundamentally flawed, prompting market participants to question the legal safeguards around mining projects.
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Business · 19 October 2026
Labor’s contentious export limits aim to keep more gas at home, risking a diplomatic backlash from Asian energy giants as markets scramble to adjust.
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Business · 19 October 2026
After collapsing in June following an ill‑fated retail expansion, the athleisure brand Stax is being revived by the couple who founded a popular sneaker‑trading marketplace. Their plan relies on limited‑edition dro…
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